Love 2006

You speak words of love
And I don't comprehend the meaning
You say you're fast and reckless
And that you love me for what I am and am not
But I wonder when the love will fade
Because it always does
You worship what we had
While I look forward for new adventures
You say I am your drug
But then what is mine?
Because I know that you are not the fix I need
Or maybe you are and I just don't know yet
I don't know myself
And I know that I am tempted by so much more
I don't want to hurt you or me
But I know it always happens even when I start to believe
That we could last forever
Then the boredom sets in and I see the end
Coming closer and closer until it is time
I cut you off before you speak so I can let the words out
I vomit out the searing comments
We are done and over with
Until you come back and want more
Again you crave what I have to give
But can I give it to you again?
You say we can work
And I cringe at your hope
Feeling that it can't work
Maybe I do shoot things down too fast
To protect myself and others
Who knows?
I will try
Really I will
But please please
Free me, don't clip my wings
I will fly and come home when it is time
Though don't expect that home to be you
Because I always hoped that home would be in me
I crave to be self-sufficient
I also crave a shoulder to lean on
I know I am confusing
It's amazing that you can deal with it
You know me so well
And you read me more than I want sometimes
You have kept me safe and stable
I hope you are by my side in some way or another
Forever…for eternity